Atopic close to everybody’s heart…
MID LIFE SEX.

I often come across women who come to my clinic with various complaints related to their periods or gynaecology issues.On deeper probing these are few of their commonest complaints.

1.I rarely feel in the mood to have Sex lately.
2. I don’t have any spontaneous desire.
3.Nothing seems to excite me like before.
4. I don’t remember the last time we had Sex!
5.I am always looking for an excuse to avoid Sex.

Now before you start relating yourself to this, always remember…. This is Normal as you age……

But this can Change easily.🙂
To help overcome this, let’s Understand the Sexual Cycle in short .
Basically, Women’s sexual desire is different from Men.

Women’s desire is more often responsive rather than spontaneous and can be very sensitive to the context. What that means is, if the relationship is in good shape then your body and mind will be more likely to respond to loving touch and desire will be created by that caress or hug; even if it does takes a while.

Suppressed Feelings.

What that also means is that if you aren’t happy with your partner and you can’t talk about things, then a hug or caress can feel the opposite, irritating or even downright repulsive! Often your body’s response to your partner is a sign that you need to spend more quality time or go back to that disappointment or hurt feelings that everyone is avoiding.

Gender Differences

Men’s desire is mostly, but not always spontaneous, sexual thoughts just pop into their minds anywhere and any time🙄.

It can also be assumed that a man with an erection is turned on and ready; that the body matches the mind. This can be true also for women but there’s far more variety. A woman’s genitals (being wet or dry) do not necessarily match the mental arousal. Women’s arousal is far more subjective and about the context again, whereas men’s desire is far less negatively impacted by what’s going on in his life!

However, stress, tiredness or an ongoing upset can all reduce a woman’s sexual desire to a great extent.
“Your sexuality is unique”.
We plan everything else that’s important to us; a night watching our favourite movie, going to a popular restaurant and seeing friends so what’s going on with the idea that you don’t need to plan time for intimacy with your partner.
Of course you do!!
To be continued……

Next Time……”keep that Spark alive”😉
Till then….

Dr Shalaka Shimpi
M.D.(Obstetrics and Gynaecology